I thought that there was no fucking way MacGyver was going to be able to break into this high tech vault and that the mission would have to be aborted. I was wrong. MacGyver was able to crack the vault using a bottle of Merlot and 4 wines glasses in the old fill-glasses-to-different-levels-to-produce-different-tones trick. The fourth tone proved to be the toughest but MacGyver was able to produce the correct tone by drinking an octave of wine from the glass and trying again. This was even more bullshit than the fucking laser thing from earlier.
With the vault open all that was left to do was get the diamonds out of there.
Chris had done her part by getting the gamblers all pissed with the casino. People were fighting, breaking things and generally going ape shit, so when the fuse blew and the machines started going haywire at 2:10 it was fucking pandemonium in there.
Using the drainpipe from before that I'm 100% certain MacGyver left downstairs and hadn't had with him in the last 15 shots, he funnels the diamonds into the back of his car. MacGyver gets all 200 pounds of diamonds into the car, jumps down and gets away.
I have no idea why Catlin's penthouse is on the second floor of his casino but maybe he doesn't like heights or the elevator is always fucked and he doesn't want to walk up the stairs on a daily basis.
Chris on the other hand isn't so lucky. Catlin must have somehow figured out she was in on the diamond heist, despite never seeing her with MacGyver, and captured her before she could escape.
Catlin calls MacGyver and plans an exchange, the diamonds for the girl. Chris seemed cool and all, but I don't think she's really worth the $60 million. I'm pretty sure her father the senator would agree.
The exchange takes place on a military plane with Catlin dressed for the occasion. He must get his military gear from the same place as General Vasquez, the MacGyver costume department.
With the vault open all that was left to do was get the diamonds out of there.
Chris had done her part by getting the gamblers all pissed with the casino. People were fighting, breaking things and generally going ape shit, so when the fuse blew and the machines started going haywire at 2:10 it was fucking pandemonium in there.
Using the drainpipe from before that I'm 100% certain MacGyver left downstairs and hadn't had with him in the last 15 shots, he funnels the diamonds into the back of his car. MacGyver gets all 200 pounds of diamonds into the car, jumps down and gets away.
I have no idea why Catlin's penthouse is on the second floor of his casino but maybe he doesn't like heights or the elevator is always fucked and he doesn't want to walk up the stairs on a daily basis.
Chris on the other hand isn't so lucky. Catlin must have somehow figured out she was in on the diamond heist, despite never seeing her with MacGyver, and captured her before she could escape.
Catlin calls MacGyver and plans an exchange, the diamonds for the girl. Chris seemed cool and all, but I don't think she's really worth the $60 million. I'm pretty sure her father the senator would agree.
The exchange takes place on a military plane with Catlin dressed for the occasion. He must get his military gear from the same place as General Vasquez, the MacGyver costume department.
What happens next is without doubt the most ridiculous sequence of events ever put together on television.
MacGyver drives the car, filled with diamonds, onto the military plane. Catlin gives MacGyver Chris and checks the diamonds. Catlin's men disappear leaving him alone with Chris and MacGyver who are able to easily overpower him and push him into the planes elevator. Catlin heads to the cockpit and tells the pilot to head to 30000 feet as the lack of oxygen will kill them. MacGyver then straps a parachute to the car and drives it out the back of the plane. The parachute opens and the car drifts safely to the ground with the both of them unharmed.
Seriously, what the fuck? Why did the armed muscle leave an unarmed Catlin alone with MacGyver and Chris? How were they able to overpower him so easily? How the fuck did they drive a car out of a plane with a parachute and survive?
I don't think there is any plausible explanation this time.
Anyway, the two were obviously relieved that they'd survived. There was a bit of a make out session in the car as it floated down to earth and while gravity would suggest there wasn't enough time for some dicking MacGyver would have certainly given her a quick finger blasting.
I now totally get the Alan Smithee credit. I don't think any director would want to put his name to this episode. MacGyver is known for his ability to get out of extremely difficult situations but the ways in which he does it are usually within the realms of possibility.
Several times during this episode I found myself thinking "what in fuck is that"? Once you take away the believability you take away what is truly great about the show.
MacGyver showed us that you can use wine for more than drinking and that it is possible to finger someone in mid-air.
THE END
MacGyver drives the car, filled with diamonds, onto the military plane. Catlin gives MacGyver Chris and checks the diamonds. Catlin's men disappear leaving him alone with Chris and MacGyver who are able to easily overpower him and push him into the planes elevator. Catlin heads to the cockpit and tells the pilot to head to 30000 feet as the lack of oxygen will kill them. MacGyver then straps a parachute to the car and drives it out the back of the plane. The parachute opens and the car drifts safely to the ground with the both of them unharmed.
Seriously, what the fuck? Why did the armed muscle leave an unarmed Catlin alone with MacGyver and Chris? How were they able to overpower him so easily? How the fuck did they drive a car out of a plane with a parachute and survive?
I don't think there is any plausible explanation this time.
Anyway, the two were obviously relieved that they'd survived. There was a bit of a make out session in the car as it floated down to earth and while gravity would suggest there wasn't enough time for some dicking MacGyver would have certainly given her a quick finger blasting.
I now totally get the Alan Smithee credit. I don't think any director would want to put his name to this episode. MacGyver is known for his ability to get out of extremely difficult situations but the ways in which he does it are usually within the realms of possibility.
Several times during this episode I found myself thinking "what in fuck is that"? Once you take away the believability you take away what is truly great about the show.
MacGyver showed us that you can use wine for more than drinking and that it is possible to finger someone in mid-air.
THE END
No fucking around with recovering a horse or stealing a map this week, it's straight down to business.
I didn't have high hopes for this episode when I discovered that it was "directed" by Alan Smithee. Could it be that a director was unable to exercise full creative control leaving us the viewer with an inferior MacGyver to that of which he or she had originally envisioned? My initial concern quickly dissipated when I found out that guest starring in this episode was one of the finest Australian actors to ever grace the screen, Vernon Wells. Could Wells bring the same dynamic performance to MacGyver as he did to Commando in the role of Bennett? This question was answered in the first scene where he pulled out a gun and shot a guy in the face, a guy that was on his team. What a fucking maniac.
Diamonds worth $60 million have been stolen and are in the possession of Catlin (Vernon Wells) an ex-mercenary soldier of fortune who moved to the Virgin Islands a few years ago with a shitload of cash and his own army. Doesn't impress you? Well in Angola he is known simply as "The Butcher".
MacGyver has been sent to the Virgin Islands by a senator in order to get the diamonds back, which actually belong to a charity raising money to help starving kids in Africa or some shit. The senators daughter is also conveniently located in the Virgin Islands, so MacGyver is to rendezvous with her as she has the intel, get the diamonds and get the fuck out of there. What kind of charity delivers its funds in diamonds?
It seems that all Macgyver does is retrieve shit. Be it horses, maps, people, a canister of toxic material, a watch or launch codes, his missions don't have a great deal of variety. I guess at least he gets to try and bang a different chick in an exotic location each week.
In typical MacGyver fashion, he gets a quick look at the senators daughters tits before they get down to business. The senators daughter, Chris, informs MacGyver that Catlin is untouchable in these parts and that there is no way they can bring him to justice and recover the stolen diamonds.
MacGyver has a plan. A plan as brazen as it is stupid. MacGyver's plan is to steal the diamonds back.
When asked exactly how he planned to recover the diamonds, MacGyver said that he likes his plans like he likes his women, loose. He didn't say that that exactly but he did say he likes loose plans and I did a little reading between the lines.
Chris knows the diamonds are in one of the two vaults located in the Casino owned by Catlin.
The first vault is used to store the winnings of Casino guests, so the only way MacGyver can get in there is by winning and winning big. Just how is MacGyver going to do that? Cheat.
Inside the casino, MacGyver needs a diversion so he can steal some dice.
Just when you start thinking "dude, all you ever do is create diversions and then recover shit", MacGyver makes you remember that diversions are cool by pulling out his best one yet. Using a paperclip and some string, MacGyver hooks the zipper on the back of a chicks dress and rips it off her.
Just when you start thinking "dude, all you ever do is create diversions and then recover shit", MacGyver makes you remember that diversions are cool by pulling out his best one yet. Using a paperclip and some string, MacGyver hooks the zipper on the back of a chicks dress and rips it off her.
What a fucking animal.
With every dude in the place trying to check out this chicks tits, MacGyver is able to take the dice, run to the bathroom and file them down with a shoe polisher so that he'll always roll up 7.
After telling a woman his name is James Bond and winning about 12 games in a row he decides it time to quit. Catlin, also with a penchant for white suits, escorts MacGyver to the vault in order to store his winnings.
The Vault is extremely small, with no room for the diamonds. Process of elimination leaves only the vault in Catlin's room, exactly what MacGyver didn't want. Just as he is about to leave the casino, his fixed dice are located and MacGyver is fucked.
MacGyver is able to get out of this bind by running away very quickly and knocking over the guys pursuing him with a mobile bar launched at them using gas canisters.
After an extremely awkward hand holding scene back at Chris's house that was probably the catalyst for the Alan Smithee credit, the two formulate the second part of the plan.
Chris is to cause a riot at the casino by tricking the gamblers into thinking the games are rigged which she will do with magnets, while MacGyver breaks into Catlin's room and steals back the diamonds. The riot must be taking place at 2:10 am for the plan to work.
At the casino, here is how it went down.
MacGyver steals a drain pipe and somehow sneaks this into the casino, he then rigs up a timer to a fuse box that will short out the electricity at exactly 2:10. The security camera outside of Catlin's room is taken care of with a contraption constructed by MacGyver consisting of a mirror tied to a coat hanger.
Once inside Catlin's room, MacGyver uses cigar ash to detect where the security lasers are in a nod to the pilot, before diverting the path of the lasers with a tube in what can only be described as bullshit, allowing him access to the room.
The vault is something the likes of which MacGyver has surprisingly never seen before. I really though he would be up to date with all the latest vault technology but he must have let his Vault Monthly subscription lapse which is understandable as he is constantly out of the country on missions.
He needs to see the vault in action. If only he could get Catlin in the room to give him a demonstration. He sets off an alarm using Catlin's bird and hides in the wardrobe. A few minutes later Catlin appears and thankfully for MacGyver opens the vault just to make sure that the bird hadn't stolen the diamonds.
MacGyver discovers that the cutting edge vault is sound activated, opened using a series of tones which Catlin produces using his key ring. It would have been way more awesome if to open the safe Catlin had to play a face melting solo on a Flying V, but he'd have to make sure the guitar was constantly in tune and there is the possibility he'd break a string so this this key ring method is, time wise and in terms of ease of use, much better.
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